Curious about butt plugs but not sure where to start? You're in good company. Plugs are one of the most popular toys out there for people of every gender and relationship status, and the beginner experience comes down to three things: the right size, plenty of lube and zero rush. This guide walks you through choosing your first plug, getting ready, the first time itself and keeping things clean afterward, so your first try feels comfortable, confident and fun.
What Is a Butt Plug, Exactly?
A butt plug is a toy designed to be inserted and then stay comfortably in place, rather than being moved in and out the way a dildo usually is. Most plugs share the same basic shape:
- A tapered tip that makes insertion gradual and gentle.
- A wider bulb that gives that satisfying feeling of fullness.
- A narrow neck where the body relaxes and holds the plug in place.
- A flared base, the non-negotiable safety feature that keeps the toy from going too far.
That flared base is the golden rule of anal play: anything that goes in the backdoor should have one. Never improvise with household objects.
Why People Love Them
The appeal is simple. The area is packed with sensitive nerve endings, and a plug offers a steady, full sensation that many people find relaxing and arousing at the same time. Some enjoy wearing one during solo play with a vibrator. Others like adding one to partnered play for an extra layer of sensation. For people with a prostate, a plug can add pressure in just the right area. And for anyone curious about anal play in general, a small plug is the gentlest possible way to explore at your own pace.
How to Choose Your First Plug
Start smaller than you think
The most common beginner mistake is sizing up too soon. Look for a plug with a slim profile, roughly an inch or a little less at its widest point. You can always go bigger later. A plug that feels too small on night one usually feels just right once you're relaxed. A small silicone plug like this one from Me You Us is an easy, low-pressure first pick.
Pick body-safe materials
- Silicone is the beginner favorite. It's soft with a little give, warms quickly to body temperature and is easy to clean. Pair it with water-based lube.
- Metal and glass are firm, smooth and weighty, and they're great for temperature play once you know what you like. They work with almost any lube.
- Skip porous, jelly-like materials that can hold onto bacteria and can't be fully cleaned.
Consider a training set
If you think you'll want to work your way up, a set with several graduated sizes is the smart buy. You start with the smallest, move up when (and only if) you want to, and you're not guessing about size. The Adam & Eve Sunset Dreams Anal Plug Training Kit is built exactly for that.
Fancy extras can wait
Jeweled bases, vibrating plugs and app-controlled models are a blast, but they're easier to enjoy once you know your comfortable size and shape. Browse the full ANAL collection when you're ready to level up.
Lube Is Not Optional
Unlike some parts of the body, the anus doesn't create its own lubrication, so lube is what makes the whole experience comfortable. Be generous, and reapply whenever things feel less than slippery.
- Water-based lube is safe with every toy material, including silicone, and cleans up easily.
- Thicker gels made for anal play stay put longer and give extra cushion. Try Adam & Eve Forbidden Water-Based Anal Lubricant or explore the LUBE collection.
- Silicone lube lasts a long time but can damage silicone toys, so save it for metal or glass plugs.
- Skip numbing products. Mild sensations are your body's way of telling you to slow down, and you want to be able to hear it.
Want the full rundown? Our lube guide breaks down every type.
Getting Ready
- Pick a relaxed moment. No time pressure, no distractions, phone on silent.
- Freshen up. A warm shower and a bathroom trip beforehand help a lot of people feel more at ease. Elaborate prep usually isn't necessary.
- Trim your nails if you'll be using your fingers to warm up.
- Clean the toy and set out lube and a towel within reach.
- Get aroused first. Your body relaxes more easily when you're already turned on, so take your time with whatever you enjoy.
Your First Time, Step by Step
1. Get comfortable
Lying on your side with your knees pulled toward your chest is a great starting position. Lying on your back with your knees up, or kneeling, works well too.
2. Warm up gently
Start with external touch, then a lubed fingertip if you like. Take slow, deep breaths. Many people find that gently bearing down as they exhale helps the muscles relax.
3. Go slow with the plug
Lube the plug generously, place the tip, and let your body set the pace. Press gently, pause, breathe and continue. Expect the widest part to take a moment, then the neck settles into place.
4. Pause and check in
Once it's in, just notice how it feels. Fullness and a little pressure are normal. Sharp pain is not, and it means stop. There's no prize for pushing through.
5. Keep the first session short
Try a few minutes at first. Move around a little, add other stimulation or simply enjoy the sensation. Over time, many people enjoy longer sessions, but most guidance suggests keeping wear time moderate rather than all day.
6. Remove it gently
Relax, breathe out and ease the plug out slowly by the base. Add a little more lube if needed.
Bringing a Plug Into Partner Play
Plugs are a fantastic couples toy. Talk about it beforehand, agree on a simple word that means "stop," and let the person receiving set the pace. Many couples love using a plug during foreplay, or keeping it in during other play for added sensation. Wearing one during sex creates a snug, intense feeling for both partners.
Cleaning and Care
Wash your plug with warm water and a mild soap or toy cleaner after every use, let it air-dry, and store it in its own pouch. Never move a toy from anal to vaginal use without washing it thoroughly first. Our toy-care guide covers every material.
Quick Beginner Tips
- Size down, lube up, slow down. That's the whole formula.
- Choose a plug with a wide, stable base.
- Relaxation beats force every single time.
- Discomfort means pause. Pain means stop.
- Don't share plugs without cleaning, and use a condom over the toy if you swap.
FAQ
Does it hurt the first time?
It shouldn't. With a small plug, lots of lube and a relaxed pace, most people feel pressure and fullness rather than pain. If something hurts, stop and try again another day.
What size should a beginner buy?
Go small and slim, or grab a training kit with several sizes so you can find your comfort zone without guessing.
How long can I wear one?
Start with a few minutes. As you get more comfortable, longer sessions are common, but give your body breaks and remove it if anything feels off.
Are butt plugs only for certain people?
Not at all. Plugs are enjoyed by people of all genders and orientations, solo and with partners.
Can I use any lube?
Water-based lube works with everything. Avoid silicone lube on silicone toys, and keep oil away from latex condoms.
Ready to Explore?
Your first plug is all about curiosity and comfort. Start small, use more lube than you think you need, and give yourself permission to take it slow. When you're ready, browse our ANAL collection for beginner-friendly plugs and training kits. Have fun exploring.
